My beloved family and friends,
First I would like to apoligize for my letters that probably seem to never answer the questions that you all are asking me and the things that you want to hear. I know, I am not that good at writing the things that I am seeing here and about the people that I am meeting, and I realize that is going to come back to bite me when I am back of the mission and wanting to read about my mission stories, but I like to write to the people that i love back home the same way that I talk to the people that i love here in Portugal. That is, I want to help you all feel the spirit and make decisions on how you can all better your lives by coming closer to Christ. I may be always preaching to the Choir, but even the Choir needs salvation haha so I will continue on the way that I am feeling.
I feel like there is usually a time in our lives that we have to start thinking a little bit more in the future. Begin to make changes that we help us become the person that we really need to be. In my life, right now, I feel like this is one of those times that I need to start making a couple changes, some big decisions, and start become the person that I need to be. I dont know how many times that I have said that in the past letters, but I think this one really counts, I feel like now is the time that I have to really grow up and take full responsability of my actions and the decisions that I have to make. As much as I would love to keep by the side of the best dad and mom in the world, I feel like from now on its gotta be me. Hahaha I can see people saying,.... oh.. how cute, he is trying to grow up hahahaha but ya, I guess I am:)
I just have been thinking a lot about it all, and have had some new thoughts and answers come to me that have helped me arrive to this point in my life. The decisions that I make now, we determine my life FOREVER, and the way that i give up my life for the Lord right now, will also determine a lot of the preparation that i need for the life after the mission. Pretty much what I have come to realize is that there are a lot of things that I need to develope to be ready to be back home in the real life, and I want to start or explode that develope right now, so that I dont feel so unprepared after the mission. I want to feel that complete confidence in myself, but more importantly in the Lord, so that when those big decisions are at my feet, I know what to do, and I can take them on. I have been praying a lot about this all, and I have felt so many answers coming through my companion and even the people that we are teaching. What I have decided is that the best way to prepare myself for those big decisions, is to dedicate myself fully to Christ, and let him take and shape me into the person that I need to be. Aka, I am trusting a lot that the Lord will give me more experiences that will help me grow in this aspect.
I know its a phase that everyone has to go through in their lives, but I guess I just think about it a lot. I know that this next year will be a year that will determine a lot of who I am and who I will become so I need to GROW UP haha. I feel my potential, I know what i can be, now I need to just start working on it and really becoming that person that i need to be.
The work is good here in Portugal. It is always good:) I am learning so much. Truly what is happening with me, is I am learning more and more what I need to do and change to become more like our Savior, Jesus Christ. I think that is really what the mission is about. Becoming more and more like him, and learning how to establish the habits in our lifes to continue to become more and more like him. Some missionaries come back the same as they left, some come back more mature, so do worse then they were haha, me, I want to continue to grow at the rate I am growing, for the rest of my life. I dont want it to stop:) Its changing my life and I feel happy about it all:)
Love you all!!!